Thoughts

Writing this while almost everyone is sleeping.. 

Ang dami dami pumapasok sa isip ko what will happen to me right after I get off from this plane. Pero one thing is certain, things will never be the same again. Umayon man o hindi sa plano ko, things will definitely change. 

Ginusto ko to eh. Inisip at pinlano ko to. Panindigan ko dapat di ba? I was asking for change. Itapon ang lahat ng naumpisahan sa Pilipinas. Hingang malalim. Kaya ko to. 

Going Loca @ Locavore

When I worked with 24/7, I had three girl friends (Mic, Kei and Teejay). We call ourselves Friday Girls. Because we normally go out every Fridays after a hard days at work. We would try different restaurants in the metro that is within our budget. And it is said that Great Bonds were formed during meal time. 

Anyways, since it has been a while when we were complete, as part of my send off dinner, they agreed to meet up and I get to pick the place. I chose Locavore in Pasig. I am fond of reading blogs, food reviews, and stalking celebrities instagram posts, and Locavore has always been on their list. It seemed that the place has some sort of Conyo vibe. 

For starters, we had Singkamas and Mangga (Php 180), its the regular slice of Mangoes and Turnip with three different dips, Patis Asukal (Sugared Fish Sauce), Chili Smoked Rock Salt, and Shrimp Paste. 

We also had Kinilaw Platter (Php380). It is similar to Kilawin, where it is a raw meat or seafood where its main ingredient is Vinegar or anything that has acidic solution. We were given three types of Kinilaw, one with tuna (left), tanigue (middle) and shrimp (right). Apparently not everyone in our group has a thing for raw meat, they said it is an acquired taste but I like how it was mixed with shallots and mangoes to remove the gamey of the meat. 

And then we had Lechon and Oyster Sisig (Top) Php400 and Sizzling Sinigang (Bottom) Php530, and both were great! The sisig were crunchy and very tasty. While the Sizzling Sinigang was something to look forward to, it is Beef Short Ribs and they sauteed the french beans, instead of the regular soupy sinigang, it was served as a gravy and even my friend who's not adventurous with food loved the dish.

Last on our viands list was the Kare Kare Wings (Php295), I think Chicken Wings is originally a starter meal but since it was coated with Kare Kare sauce, it passed as a viand for us! This is another dish I appreciate that it was crispy and tasty and saucy at the same time. 

For our dessert, this is a homemade Leche Flan with Dulce De Leche sauce (Php200) and its a good thing we ordered it. It was to die for! It wasn't too sweet but very tasty that for me, you don't even need the sauce. 

All in all, our group paid around Php2300 for the entire meal including a platter of rice which is good for 5-6 persons. 

I will give them a 4 out of 5 stars. The ambience was great, it was very laid back actually, the food is also great, it is indeed a filipino dish with a twist, but the parking isn't, though we came in early so we had no problem parking our car. 

And this was us! 

Love, 

AngelSmile02

Understanding (Beyond Language)

I was having dinner with my Ate, when he sent this message to me... 

"You are strong for getting out of bed in the morning even when it feels like hell..

You are brave for doing things, even if they scare you, or they make you feel anxious.

And You are brave for trying and holding on no matter how hard it is.

So please, i hope you are proud of yourself and you deserve that change you've been praying for..."

- I know that this message is copied from somewhere and you just added a personal note on it. nevertheless, the fact that you made an effort to understand, learn and write this to me in English (he is Turkish, by the way), is enough proof that you tried understanding why there are times, I had some mood swings, why you noticed that whenever I am thinking of something, I always grab a pen and start doodling and why I sleep during our conversations via facetime. Thank you for those effort, we may not have what others have, but you understand that times like this, I need a listener and a friend. 

Love, 

AngelSmile02

Cycle of Acceptance

Sometimes, those unexpected things would make you think or weigh your current situation. I was having coffee in a small cafe somewhere in Makati when I had the time to have a little reality check...

Naisip ko, yes, some would think I live a very colorful life. Ang dami kong nagawa, napuntahan, at na experience these past 8 years. Pero come to think of it, nothing much or baka nga nothing happened on my career since I started working. Nasan ako? Agent pa din sa call center. Bakit nga ba hindi ko inaspire to push for other position? Bakit nga ba hindi ako nag excel para mapansin ng management? Anong mali sa nagawa ko? Compare to my friends, parang walang nangyari sa akin. Masyado ba akong naging happy go lucky nitong mga nakaraan taon?

I remember one article I read online. First stage is DENIAL. This is not happening. This isn't true. I am not failing. It is the situation that is wrong, not me. Hay, dineny ko pa na yes, napabayaan ko nga siya. I took my career for granted. Inisip ko, I finish college, madami akong puwedeng aplayan after nito. Hindi ko inisip na 8 years and counting na pala akong in denial sa sitwasyon ko. Nakakahiya. Ang sarap ko sampalin.

Second stage is ANGER. Eto na ang iba't ibang klase ng angst ko. I detached myself from friends. Nagalit ako sa lahat kasi napagiwanan ako. Kung sino sino sinisi ko. To the point na pati politics pinagbuntunan ko ng galit. In short, nag pin point ako who to blame why this is happening.

Third stage is DEPRESSION. For me, there is a thin line between ANGER and DEPRESSION. After ko sisihin ang kung sino sino, na depress ako, mas pinili ko to deal things on my own. Good thing sana yun if I am doing it to improve or heal myself. Pero hindi, I was sulking over the idea that I sucked. I failed. Eto na ung mga eksena na nakakahiya, ano na lang iisipin ng mga kamaganak ko. Sabi ko nga, I finish college, I should be on top pero wala, nganga. Nakakahiya. I even wanted to  bury myself sa kahihiyan.

Fourth stage is BARGAINING. akala ko sa market lang to applicable pero sa buhay din pala. Eto ang start ng confusion ko. I have to weigh things literally. Dahil sa kapabayaan ko, I bargained things na dapat nakuha ko lahat kung hindi lang ako sinapian ng kapabayaan.

Final stage is ACCEPTANCE. My mama has always been our source of positivity. Even people around her can attest to it. I am my mother's daughter and I thank her for instilling in me that I should be able to surpass all this. I need to accept the fact na, i failed at this job, BUT just like a story, it has to end for new beginnings can come.

Why am I saying this? Walang nangyari sa career ko. Entry level kind of job na at my age hindi na dapat. Ayoko nang sisihin ang tinatawag na "Office Politics" na kesyo I don't want to kiss the bosses' ass kaya I am still here, na I don't want to be like them na kinakain na ng paninira sa iba makaangat lang. Saan ko nga ba uumpisahan ang change na gusto ko?

Sana this year, makuha ko na ang CHANGE na para sa akin. Sa Pilipinas man o hindi.

The Yabu Experience

I am back! And hopefully, hindi na naman ako tamarin to post for new experiences. As for new learnings, since my last post, there was a lot that happened, and siguro it should be on another post, because this is intended for YABU experience only. (^_^)

Me and my food buddy and fellow kaladkarin, Glaiza, were thinking where to eat one Saturday afternoon. She hasn't eaten anything then, and I was a little hungry too, so after our little shopping splurge, we had to choose where to satisfy our thirst for good food/adventure. We were thinking between, Mad Mark's (I am not sure of the spelling), or somewhere else.

One thing I liked about Glorietta 5 in Makati is, even though it is a weekend, there were only few people strolling, eating and shopping in the area. Maybe because you really had to go there, unlike other parts of Glorietta that it is just beside the MRT, or just few distance from the bus station. Anyways, going back, Glaiza remembered that there is a branch of YABU in the area and we have been wanting to try it out since November of 2013.

Then Yabu it is. Upon arrival, the ambience was a little bit intimidating maybe because there was barely anyone there (location wise kasi, dadayuhin talaga siya so I guess not everyone is aware na may ganyang restaurant in the area)

We were ushered to our table, and in fairness, very prompt ang service! We were given the menu agad-agad, and though we were gutom, we still manage to go all thru the menu to check what we wanted.

After getting our orders, we were served this mini bowl of toasted sesame seeds, and a club shaped, pestle.  You have to do the old style of grinding the sesame seeds for the aroma and flavor to break in. It smelled like our version of Pinipig. I just love the smell of it!

Afterwards, the waiter gave instructions how to use their selection of condiments. Sabi ni kuya waiter, you can pour three spoonfuls of their special yabu sauce, (extreme left in the photo), then three smaller bottle written in Japanese Characters were chili sauce, flakes, and oil so it is up to you na timplahan siya. The three tall bottles were for the cabbage salad dressing, and the last one (extreme right in the photo) were salt for the fruits.

What I had : Menchi.
I loved it! It's a mix of minced meat of beef and pork with cheese! I love everything that has dairy product on it. Yabu was not kidding when they said they do take their katsu's seriously. It was insanely tasteful! It was not nakakaumay given the fact na may dairy siya. Plus the Panko breadcrumbs that were used were fresh, and hindi nakakasugat ng gums whenever you have a bite on it. And I think one reason why hindi siya nakakasawa kasi hindi makapal ang breadcrumbs as oppose to the meat itself. Another thing is the way it was cook, it was not greasy at all! The color is bright, and golden and crisp!

Their Cabbage Salad is okay lang, Glaiza told me one Japanese Restaurant (within the area too) that she liked their cabbage salad better than Yabu's, I think it has something to do with the quality of the cabbage or the dressing itself. But Yabu's isn't that bad, don't get me wrong, it was good, but as always, there's better, or it could have been better, or something like that.

I also had bowl of fruits as part of my katsu set, apparently there were only two choices, watermelon and pineapple. I love these fruits and it was a bit of a hassle to ask numerous times for refill, because they were only giving one slice per fruit. But again, Katsu is their main thing, so wala akong masabi dun kundi 4 out of 5 stars! (I hope my vote counts for something)

All in all, the experience was good, and the person I was with then was not afraid to try new stuff so it probably added to the experience na rin. Most probably than not, I will be back. (^_^)

WildFlour Cafe

I had always wanted to try their famous cronuts so with my food buddy glai, we indulged ourselves to this famous hybrid of pastry in the metro. 

I liked their cronus but I love the one I had in Le Coeur De France (that's another story). It was flaky, airy and tasty. Since the texture is flaky, it tends to be messy when you eat. What I had is their Chocolate Cronut and Glai had their premium cronut version of Tiramisu. Both were chocolatey in taste, not too sweet but it was really flaky. 

We also ordered their mac and cheese and it was a bliss! It was creamy, cheesy and the pasta is al dente which made it soo yummy for dairy lovers like me. (^_^)

I was craving for bread pudding that day, so i ordered for one when i saw it was available but it has a disclaimer wherein you have to allow 30 minutes for them to prepare. But it was worth the wait. The pudding has chocolate filling inside, it has powdered sugar on top to enhance the flavor of the bread and the pudding itself? Creamy and soft inside! 

I once spoke to a customer who recommends vietnamese coffee for coffee enthusiasts like me. And since this hot drink is available, i gave in. And boy i tell you, it was yummy! Just my kind of sweetness and it's not that strong. 

With the service we got? I'm a bit disappointed. We had to ask twice for my soda, had to repeat myself thrice for refilling my water. And it took quite a while for my take out order. 

Happy Birthday

I will be 27 few hours from now.. I was thinking if i learned anything for the past 7 years after graduation, for the past 10 years after mama left, may narealize ba ako? Hindi ba nakayuko ang nanay ko sa taas kasi ikinahihiya niya mga ginawa ko? Proud kaya siya sa lahat ng decisions ko?

Every year, consistent ako in spending my birthday eating out with family and friends. This year, aside from the fact i didn't plan for anything, hindi rin ako nag budget since wala nga akong plano.

Pero what i did differently is I did quite a few thinking.. For the past years, may na accomplish ba ako? May narating ba ako? May natutunan ba ako? I do not have a flourishing career, nor a successful lovelife.. One thing i am proud of is I experienced a LOT this year.. Travels, learnings and pains..

I have been to different places for quite sometime now. Been learning a lot not just from the people i met, but also about the experiences thru those travel. And pain because not every travel i had where smooth sailing... May nawala, may nadagdadan na friend, may nawala din..

Pero one thing i learned is wala akong pinagsisihan sa lahat ng yun... Good or bad, lahat yun helped me with the choices, or solutions i made today. Those experiences, made me firm about my stand.

Hopefully this year na uumpisahan ko, with the help of those experiences, ma accomplish ko naman ang career and lovelife. Although wala talaga sa isip ko ang latter, not in the next ten years.. :p

I just want a well lived life. A life na walang takot. Yung hindi ako natatakot maubusan ng finances both for my needs and family's needs, isama pa ang super dami kong wants. Yung life na kaya ko panindigan lahat ng desisyon ko, yung kaya ko magdesisyon for myself and hindi napupush ng iba.

Lastly, at the end of the day, i just want to make my mother proud.

Happy 27th to me!