Until our conversation were shifted to having a child. I remembered me saying, "kaya ayoko ng bata eh". My friend told me that I was only saying that because I don't have one yet. I told her, not that I don't plan of having one, but with my state now, where I get easily irritated if kids won't listen to you nowadays, it is really hard to have one. She said isn 't nice to have one almost the same generation as I am? I mean, for me, a baby is a BLESSING. A blessing for me, is something you handle with care. Why would I have someone now where I'm not ready, emotionally and financially, and still so much to learn?
I know for a fact how hard it is to raise a child. Not that I don't have any experience but I tried taking care of my baby cousins and it gets quite expensive because you just don't feed them, you nurture them, you send them to school and such.
I'm at the point of my life where I wanted to be free. I wanted to travel, here and abroad. I wanted to try working to a different place. Try some stuff like bungee jumping, eat an exotic food or just be somewhere else. I wanted to do a lot of things so much I might think that the baby I thought of as a blessing might be a nuisance for me.
I wanted to have one. No mistake about that. But before that, I wanted to maximize my single hood, me being young and free. I wanted to enjoy it to the fullest. So that once I need or have to sit back and be a mom, I won't have any what ifs in life. What if I tried this, what if I did that questions are questions I hate to ponder on. Do not mistake my want not to have one for now doesn't mean I don't want one in the future.
